Stop Chasing Happiness: Why Acceptance Works Better

Hello friends,

It’s 2024 and time to get back into it!

This week in building health 👇

How Chasing Happiness Can Lead to Misery

Until I was 33, I had only lived in the city.

Gradually, I found it increasingly busy, loud, crowded, and stifling.

But… I was stuck.

My work was in the city.

My family was in the city.

Everyone I knew was there.

I just couldn’t leave.

Meanwhile, friends in rural areas seemed more relaxed, laid-back, and happier.

I wanted their happiness.

Understanding Happiness: Beyond the Myths

We all want to be happy.

Yet it remains elusive for most of us. There are many misconceptions about happiness. Here are some I’ve seen:

• Happiness means you’re always joyful.

• Happiness comes from getting what you want.

• Happiness is something you acquire and keep forever.

Let’s change that conversation.

The Pitfalls of Chasing Euphoria: Insights from Psychiatry

Today’s article features a powerful case study on a patient with bipolar disorder. If you’re unfamiliar with bipolar disorder, it’s a mental health condition marked by extreme mood swings, including emotional highs (mania or hypomania) and lows (depression).

In the article, we encounter Mark's story, a patient with bipolar disorder. For Mark, chasing 'happiness' leads to unsustainable highs and devastating lows.

The problem is that ‘happiness’ is unsustainable.

Mark’s ambition to return to that state of mind and remain there indefinitely will never be realized.

Society often misunderstands happiness, picturing it as constant elation.

Which is far from the truth individuals like Mark experience in their mental health journeys.

A Realistic Approach to Well-Being

Something called Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (aka ACT) is starting to gain some popularity.

ACT emphasizes acceptance over chasing happiness forever.

And at the heart of ACT is the understanding that truly being ‘happy’ means embracing the full range of life’s experiences—both the good and the bad.

ACT teaches us to deal with negative emotions and thoughts in a healthy way, recognizing them as natural and integral parts of the human experience.

Practical Steps Towards Self-Compassion and Real Contentment

How can you do this for yourself?

Here are a few quick ideas to start.

1. Embracing Self-Compassion in Daily Life

2. Mindfulness Techniques for Emotional Balance

3. Reframing Perspectives on Success and Failure

4. Building Resilience Through Acceptance and Flexibility

These are all lifelong practices, but they can your first step into being ‘happy’

→ Read more on this here

My favorite health things for the week

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Understanding the Stress Response

11 minutes | Heather Jones

How does work stress affect the body?

What happens when you lose a job? Or a relationship? Or someone passes away?

Well… It’s complicated

But the body reacts to emotional events by releasing hormones like cortisol, initially aiding in coping with immediate dangers or challenges.

However, when stress persists, it transitions into chronic stress, leading to various health issues such as heart disease, diabetes, and mental health conditions.

Our bodies respond to emotional and physical stress in the same way. So effective stress management is key to maintaining overall health and well-being.

→ Read more on this here

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Eight Ways Your Perception of Reality Is Skewed

8 minutes | Jill Suttie

I like to think I’m immune to bias

But of course that’s not true!

This article was a good reminder for me that our perceptions are far from objective. In fact, it’s constantly affected by our energy, physical state, and even political beliefs.

For instance, did you know that being physically tired can make distances appear farther, or that our political leanings can fog up our math skills?

It's a hilarious reminder that we're all susceptible to these perceptual biases, no matter how much we'd like to think we're immune.

→ Read More About it Here

// three

New study: A better way to kill time

6 minutes | Jacqueline Nesi, Ph.D.

This article nudges us to rethink our default screen-gazing habits.

Especially during those inevitable down time moments while waiting in line at the cashier.

This study shows that ditching your phone in favor of some real-world interaction boosts your happiness BY A LOT.

It turns out, engaging with the world around us, even if it's just small talk in a waiting room, beats the fleeting satisfaction of scrolling through our phones.

As a new parent, I'm particularly struck by the impact of this— whenever there’s a screen around our newborn is always looking in that direction.

And clearly it’s not her fault.

It’s the screens.

And I’ve suddenly become aware of just how powerful they are.

It's a reminder that I need to be more intentional about my phone use, not just for my baby's sake, but for my own well-being too.

→ Read More About it Here

Until next time

What are your goals for 2024? How is it going so far?

Feel free to share in the comments or reply to this email

Until then,

Have a Healthy Weekend